My grandma’s chemo isn’t working. She was admitted into the hospital tonight and after a couple of scans, they found a large cyst in her intestines. She needs surgery, but she isn’t going to do it. It’s her choice, but we’re all finding it hard to cope with. At most, if she stops treatments, she will have less than a year.

My children will never meet her, she will not be at my wedding, and there is going to come a time where I will never get to hear her sweet voice again. God. God. God. Why? Why is this happening? Why do I feel so selfish right now?